Commentary

Pizza Boy

My favorite job was being a pizza boy. I liked making cash. Everyday taking home money. Cool people, I met. The coolest people I met at pizza places. Also, very relaxed setting. Like if it wasn’t busy, I could bullshit around with everyone or I could just go to my car and do something. For example, write poems. And I got to listen to music all the time. It was good. I had some car issues so I was no longer able to be a beloved pizza boy. But I liked being a pizza boy. Let the record show.

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Lifestyle

Calvin

a phone rings. My butler answers it.

Butler: it’s for you.

Jose: Well of course it is. Hello?

Calvin: hey this is Calvin Klein. I was just telling my assistant that we should get you to do some modeling for us.

Jose: oh yeah? I’m interested.

Calvin: ten thousand per photograph published. We’ll probably publish 6. No less than 4.

Jose: ok.

*Jose gives a thumbs up to his butler*

Calvin: free underwear too, if you want it.

Jose: yeah of course.

*30 days later*

I’m being chauffeured in my Rolls Royce.


Driver
: hey boss! Ain’t that you?

Jose: Yes. Yes Emanuel. That be me.

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Poetry

Chicago Taxes

A license is precious to have
The city uses the cover of safety
To tax the shit out of people
Not knowing a single ticket
Can ruin a teetering
Financial stability
I can attest to this
They want to squeeze every nickel
I have. Every dime I will earn
The city wants me to earn for them
Instead of taxing higher the rich
They want to suck hard
On poverty’s tit

I always had this proposal in mind
I think it is smart, I think it’s not dumb
Make the price of a ticket proportional
To the driver’s income

Traffic tickets are supposed to be punitive
How punitive is a $100 ticket
To a guy driving a tub on wheels
Bathing in riches

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Poetry

Milk Truck Life

New job: I drive a milk truck in the 20th century

I disperse milk and on my free time I go door to door selling fine silks

I live with my Asian wife and tho I’m Puerto Rican we live an Asian life

What’s for dinner? Something, something, with a side of rice

Always rice

I live in an ok neighborhood and my neighbors are recluses

When they see me they nod or throw up the deuces – but never both

I was saving up to buy a boat but my wife got cancer and I had to use those funds to stay afloat

She wasnt working plus the medical bills

I need to chill so I start smoking weed for the first time

Then out of nowhere I start writing rhymes

When she got healthy I quit my job and now I write rhymes full-time

I told her, you take care of me now

She said, Wow. It’s like that?

It’s like that, I said, and I almost added bitch

She left me a month later and took the kids

I found a one bedroom apartment in which I can live

Now all I do is write rhymes and give no shits

But every now and then I get an urge

To get back behind the wheel of my milk truck

And get out to disperse

Man, I miss those days

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