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Random Dialogue Pt. 16

Publisher: Ok so you’re Latino. Poor Urban. Mentally ill. Good looking. Oh my god this can sell!

Author: Great.

Publisher: Oh my jeeze. If you identify as non-binary, I’ll really have an orgasm.

Author: Whatever it takes, man. You can put that umm I was raised in a forest by woodpeckers for all I care.

Publisher: Perfect. Oh my Lordie. We’re gonna make a lot of money Jose. I’m telling you that right now. You’re gonna be a very rich man.

Author: You mean, non-binary.


Fade Out

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Random Dialogue Pt. 15

A judge goes home to his fat fucking wife. Ugly too.

Judge: I don’t know how much time to give this kid. He’s an adult but he’s like a fucking kid. I have to remember that. He’s an adult. The kid is an adult.

Wife: Well what’s the problem?

Judge: The problem is…I don’t know. I get a vibe…ah you wouldn’t understand.

Wife: Do you want me to suck your dick?

Judge: No bitch! I’m thinking about the kid

Wife: That’s it! You’re sleeping alone tonight.

*Wife exits*

*Judge thinks about a gangsta ass nigga*

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Random Dialogue Pt. 14

Officer 1: It’s crazy man. What some people do to escape desperate situations. Some people rob banks, some people commit financial fraud, and some people….

Officer 2: Do what he did *points to interrogation room*

Officer 1: He’s a weird looking one, I’ll tell ya that much. He looks like…. a person, but not a person. *rubs chin*

Officer 2: He looks like someone I used to know. Someone I went to highschool with…. Goddamit…. I can’t remember.

Officer 1: What do you think he’s thinking?

Officer 2
: He’s probably thinking about his next poem


Fade Out

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Random Dialogue Pt. 12

I got hired by Comedy Central

They like the way I play a guy who’s mental

Little do they know…

Producer: Ok. Now we’re gonna set the cameras here, behind you. And you just sit at your computer and do what you would normally do.

Jose: Ok.

*Jose picks his nose and smears green with a hint of red on the wall*

Producer: Wow. That’s nice.

Jose: I’m hungry. I want to eat the cheese sticks I left in the fridge.

Producer: Ok. Follow him. Come on.

*We are in the kitchen, I am leaning against the sink, eating*

Producer: This is so typical of a Jose story – it’s not going anywhere!

Jose: I rhyme daring. Feelings I ain’t sparing.

Producer: Wow. Did you guys get that?

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Random Dialogue Pt. 11

A meeting is held at DaraQuinn Pharma

Erick: Raise this medication to $10,000

Marley: But sir. It only costs 15 dollars to make.

Garon: Yeah and at 50 dollars we’re making plenty profit.

Erick: Plenty profit. *Laughs* Oh you are so naive Garon. How did you even make it this far?

Marley: Sir, no one, I mean, very few people will be able to afford this. And it’s very crucial for the health of diabetics.

Erick: It’s true that few individuals will be able to afford it. But health insurance companies will certainly be able to afford it.

Garon: And if they can’t?

Erick: Then too bad.

*Two weeks later, their only competitor raised its price from $5,000 to $10,000*

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Random Dialogue Pt. 10

Officer 1: You think he’s ready?

Officer 2: Yeah he sounds ready. Let’s bring him in.

Officer 1: You know…some people do the craziest things.

Officer 2: He’s not crazy. He’s stupid.

Officer 1: Well…I wouldn’t be so sure.

Officer 2: We’re gonna see when we bring him in. We’re gonna get a good measure of him.

Officer 1: Yeah I actually can’t wait for that.

Officer 2: I bet you a small coffee he’ll start crying for his mommy.

Officer 1: Oh shit look at that. He just wrote a post addressing us talking about him.