I received a letter in the mail.
It was from Robert Lapadu
He said the following:
The other day you drove me home. I told you to take the scenic route and you drove through as many alleys as you could. Why? At the time I didn’t ask because I was of the mindset that I should let you do your thing. Do you, as the kids say. In addition, I was engrossed by the curiosity of why the hell you were driving through alleys. I wondered evermore intently with the bounce of every speed bump. So lost in thought was I, that it did not occur to me to ask you why you were doing it.
The next day, I went to the casino to seek you, not only to seek you, but to seek you out. After describing you in vague terms, a coworker determined it was you who I was describing. He told me you don’t use phones but that you accept letters and that I could write to you. That, like your penchant for alleys, threw me for another loop. So I returned to my car and I drove to a Walgreens to buy paper and envelopes. I wrote this in the parking lot with a fleeting nostalgia that made me smile twice. I returned to the casino and entrusted this letter to your buddy. Your buddy said I was crazy and I did not disagree.
I’ve been thinking in loops, my dear driver, and to break this cycle I need an answer from you. Why on Earth, did you take the alleys? Do you not know what it means to drive scenic?