Random List Pt. 18

I ignite an explosive carrot and walk away from it slowly

I bought a squirrel at a gift shop and named it Toby

I entered a ward psychiatric and on TV I watched hockey, a hat trick

I saw a woman sucking dick at a gas station bathroom

I got my balls sucked clean by a Dirt Devil – vacuum

I sprayed perfume in my asshole and told my dog to smell it

I went to a beauty salon and told the hottest beautician, “my hair, you should gel it”

I stole an ice cream truck and used it to block traffic, then I gave everyone ice cream

I got so pissed off when I woke up kuz I was having a bad ass dream

I put my dick on the chopping block and jammed the whole guillotine


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